Conversation of the Week in 2 Acts

Angry old man: "I want to talk to the owner!"

Me: "Sir, I keep telling you, I AM the owner! You're trying to talk to me! And I'm standing right here in front of you!"

AOM: "Listen, kid, quit screwing around! You're too young to be the owner!"

Me: "And you're too senile to be out of the home alone."




Me, answering my phone: "Yo."

Al: "Hey, what up?"

Me: "Nada."

Al: "It's snowing up here. Can you believe this shit?"

Me: "It's snowing here too. Just closed. Probably gonna head home in a bit."

Al: "So are you busy right now, or can we chit-chat a little?"

Me: "Um, available to chat, totally out of chit."

Al, laughing: "Really?"

Me: "Yeah, I ran out talking to one of my grade school buddies at Starbucks this morning. But I've got this whole backlog of chat that I'm totally trying to unload."

Al: "Well, I guess we'll just have to make do with a chat then."

Me: "Only if we want to keep talking."

Al: "Right..."